Understanding Addiction and Alcohol Abuse, Part 1

Aug 22

The realm of addiction can be a hard one to tackle. There is so much stigma surrounding people who struggle with addiction, seeking help for addictive behaviors, and those who live their lives in recovery. Additionally, as a loved one watching someone struggle with addiction, it feels overwhelming on where to even start to help because it can be hard to understand as an outsider.

So I hope this blog helps act as a guide in answering some questions or providing folks with clarity on how to best approach the issue of addiction that may be overtaking their lives. It’s important to know the basics in recognizing patterns of addiction–either within ourselves or others– and also why it is so hard to break the cycle of addiction.

I wanted to start off by acknowledging that addiction does not discriminate. People do not choose to be addicted to alcohol, another substance, or compulsive behavior (i.e. gambling, porn, etc.). There is no pre-determined destiny that someone will struggle with alcoholism or substance abuse. But when that switch flips internally, it can feel impossible to stop on your own. We cannot rely solely on protective factors in our life to prevent or stop addiction from happening; we need to learn to heal ourselves from within.

Basics of Addiction

Addiction is more complex than what we see on TV– the strung out homeless person typically begging for money. It can intertwine into our daily lives and take control before we realize it’s becoming an issue. Addiction creeps up subtly and carries an immense amount of shame with it.

For some, it presents more physically, such as needing a drink (or several) when at a social gathering. For others, it may appear more discretely like spending hundreds of dollars for online purchases of items we don’t necessarily need.

For both of these scenarios of alcohol abuse or compulsive shopping, I would be curious in understanding why those behaviors are becoming a “need” or harder to limit. What could you be struggling with emotionally or avoiding mentally that results in unhealthy behaviors? That’s how I think addiction should be viewed: as a symptom.

When we start viewing more of the context surrounding addiction or alcohol abuse, we are able to better understand how to successfully manage it. It’s important to understand what is going on mentally, emotionally, physically, and socially in someone’s life to truly address the root of addictive behaviors.

Addiction, generally speaking, impacts various aspects of our life. So if we are to just “stop drinking,” “cut back on spending,” or “delete the phone apps,” then that is just removing one issue and our brains will naturally find something else to cling to if we don’t get to the source of why we are seeking these out.

As humans, we are wired for connection. This connection or attachment is usually formed at birth, but we develop many other relationships throughout our lifetime that impact us both positively and negatively as well. The strongest connection we have is with ourselves, and when we chronically feel lost with who we are, then naturally we are going to seek external validation in the form of other people, alcohol, substances, or unhealthy behaviors.

Let’s clarify some terms associated with addiction:

Tolerance: This is when we can’t keep up with the current level of consumption, we start needing more to feel the same level of satisfaction.

Withdrawal: This can be fatal with certain substances (i.e. Benzodiazepines like Xanax, Alcohol, and Opiates like Fentanyl). Our bodies enter withdrawal when we take something away that it has been so used to having regularly. This can take on various forms ranging from physical sickness to mental impairment with difficulty focusing on tasks.

Cravings: Totally normal part of being a human and usually these urges pass within 30 minutes if we are implementing the proper skills. These are an intense mental and physical feeling that our body “needs” the substance or addictive behavior.

Relapse: Some people think relapse should be avoided at all costs and to some extent (depending on the addiction), I agree. However, relapse is part of life as an imperfect human. We can relapse into a depressive episode, but that doesn’t mean we have to spiral into mindlessly shopping or binge drinking again.

Dopamine: A neurotransmitter naturally found in our brain that plays a crucial role in mood, motivation, and acts as the brain’s reward system. When we introduce a substance to our brain, this circuitry gets flooded with that good feeling. And our brain never forgets that initial rush of goodness.

Sobriety: This term can vary depending on the substance or addiction someone is struggling with. It can be viewed as isolating out one substance in your life, but still using less harmful ones. But in essence, it’s having the focus of your life on not engaging in harmful behaviors that you once did.

Recovery: This is somewhat different from sobriety in the sense that this is associated with a lifestyle change. Living your life in recovery means that you are working, or have worked, a program of some sort. In recovery you have found that giving up one thing has given you everything.

Each of these provide a layout for understanding addiction on a deeper level. It’s a complex, chronic brain disorder that can impact someone’s relationships, mental health, and physical health. It becomes obsessive, compulsive, and traumatic to struggle with addiction. It severs that authentic connection with oneself and turns us into someone we don’t even recognize anymore.

Loving someone with an addiction can be very challenging as well and oftentimes there is limited resources available for those not in addiction who want to better understand addiction. So I hope some of the insight in this blog helps break down those barriers and provides a place for healing connections to form.

Challenges of Entering Recovery

That personality change I just mentioned is what can make entering recovery extremely difficult for some. We feel lost in who we are and where to start, that we tend to push off our healing journey. As I talked about earlier, there can be varying levels of addiction which also adds a layer of how to best seek help. And it is completely dependent on the person.

If someone is drinking daily in the evenings in large amounts, but still fulfilling their job and household responsibilities, then the line of alcoholism can be blurred. Justifying and rationalizing behaviors start to take over. “I don’t have a problem. I just need to unwind from work.” At this level of alcohol abuse, it would be best to start meeting with a weekly therapist to begin exploring other ways to cope outside of work hours with stress.

If that progresses to drinking the majority of the day on the weekends, in addition to evening times, or even starting to notice increased tolerance for drinking each night. Then there is the option to seek out a higher level of care such as Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) or Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP), which are both similar but still a step down from Residential Level of Care. With these types of programs, they are built for structure and skills. They range in meeting times from anywhere between 1-3 hours multiple days a week for several months.

In addition to these various levels of treatment, there are a variety of support groups that can be essential in helping someone navigate a life in recovery. Some amazing groups include Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), SMART Recovery, Celebrate Recovery, Women for Sobriety, and so many more.

To take the step into recovery, there needs to be acknowledgement that we are struggling with controlling something in our life. This may be a simple realization, or even reflection of past attempts to stop engaging in this behavior. It is not as easy most times of just “stop drinking” or “quit gambling”, because as I noted earlier, we will find other behaviors to latch on to if we don’t do the inner healing work to be comfortable with ourselves.

Avoidance of emotions, stress, or past trauma typically leads someone to struggling with addictive behaviors. It becomes a “safer” outlet than facing what weighs on our mind. Avoidance is also what builds denial that the issue “isn’t that bad.” Avoidance can be a major barrier in getting the help we truly need so that we are free to be our authentic selves.

The first step to healing your addiction or mental health is starting with recognition. Be honest with yourself and others that you cannot continue struggling like this. Notice your patterns of consumption, whether that’s with alcohol or time spent on social media. Ask yourself if you are content with how you cope with stress in your life right now?

If you’re interested in bettering yourself and working through addictive patterns, or know a loved one who may need support, I encourage you to reach out today for a free consultation.